I Voluntarily Date This Man

JOHN: did you want to get something to eat?
KOBES:  i dunno, maybe
KOBES: but upon reflection
KOBES: maybe i will just get take out and eat at my desk tonight
JOHN: ha, lonely female lawyer
JOHN: at least she's not single! with a cat!

Thanks. 

Be a Fighter.

You know it's an election year when both sides start trotting out the same old culture war tactics.  Ever since the calendar officially flipped into "2012", the frenzied scare mongering has clicked into annoying overdrive.  I have to say, however, that these past few weeks have felt especially bad, and left me humming with outrage.  Personally, I am so over minorities getting stepped on in the name of politics, religion, or any other cockamamie excuse.

First, there was the Komen v. Planned Parenthood debacle.  Komen pulled its pink ribbon-ed funding from Planned Parenthood.  They claimed the move was the result of a "new policy" to avoid funding any institutions embroiled in legal battles.  Only idiots bought this excuse.  After a firestorm of bad press, Komen sheepishly reinstituted its Planned Parenthood funding.  As a result, Komen's Senior Vice President of Policy, Karen Handel, resigned because she hates abortion and thinks that funding an organization which provides women with contraceptives, cancer screenings, sex education, and opportunities to properly plan their parenthood is the moral equalivalent of killing babies. Right.

Then, yesterday, there was the abysmal and embarassing House hearing on Obama's contraceptive coverage healthcare initiative.  Obama declared that employers should pay for the pill, but allowed churches and religious organizations to opt out of this requirement.  This wasn't enough!, religious organizations cried.  Obama relented, and said hospitals and health clinics funded by churches or other religious organizations could also opt out.  NO, STILL NOT ENOUGH, the religious right caterwauled.  To demonstrate their outrage, Chairman Darrell Issa (R-CA) held a hearing yesterday entitled: "Lines Crossed: Separation of Church and State.  Has the Obama Administration Trampled on Freedom of Religion and Freedom of Conscience?"  (Did FoxNews write that fun diddy?)  Then, Chairman Issa promptly kicked out the only woman slated to tesitfy on the issue, Georgetown Law Student, Sandra Fluke.  (In all fairness, House Dems, you couldn't find, you know, an actual female lawyer to testify on the issue?  Anywhere?  In DC?  The lawyer capital of the United States?  Sounds to me like a staffer got lazy and asked a friend to come testify.)  Either way, this lead to further proof that overwrought, old, white men still want the last word concerning women's bodies and our reproductive capacities.

And finally, in local politics, Maryland is on the brink of being dignity-shamed by the state of New Jersey.  Yes, New Jersey.  The state best known for the Jersey Shore, the "Drunk Train", and a legal case about other states, literally, shipping its trash to NJ landfills.  Yesterday, NJ managed to pass a measure legalizing same-sex marriage.  Huzzah!  Despite my geography hopping, I have always been proud to call Maryland my home state.  I love Old Bay, crabs, Ocean City, Natty Bo, and claiming Balimore (muuuurrrrder) as my former stomping grounds.  Maryland Gov. Martin O'Malley has sponsored a same-sex marriage bill, Civil Marriage Protection Act, that's been kicking around since 2011.  A vote was supposed to occur yesterday (the same day as New Jersey), but MD pushed our vote back to this afternoon at 12:30 p.m.  Right now, most MD Dems have their eyes tilted to Dem. Sam Arora, who appears to have Notebook-inspired Alzheimer's about his former support for gay-marriage.  After some embarassing gaffes last year, Arora persists in being coy about how he'll vote this afternoon.  Honestly, Arora, let's be clear about a few fun facts:

• If 2-3 Maryland GOPers have publicly stated their support for an equality bill, you should probably vote for it.
• If Gov. Martin O'Malley has sponsored a bill, you should probably vote for it.
• If you previously told the LGBT community that you would support an equality bill, and then proceeded to take their money, you should probably vote for it.
• If Kal Penn is calling you out and simultaneously twitter-shaming your LD, you should probably vote for it.

Sam Arora's contact information follows below.  I encourage anyone reading to start getting in touch:

Twitter: @Sam_Arora
FACEBOOK: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Sam-Arora/334183772314
e-mail: sam.arora@house.state.md.us
e-mail: sam@samarora.com
(410) 841-3528, (301) 858-3528
1-800-492-7122, ext. 3528 (toll free)

Honestly.  I am full of Friday outrage. FULL OF IT.

Currently Listening: Kelly Clarkson - Stronger.

I Was Only Having Fun

It has been a TERRIFIC weekend, so I am inspired to brag about it on my blog. To start, everybody deserves to know I am still living at home in my parent's basement like some sad version of a televised sitcom.  ("2 Broke Girls", racist depictions of Asians aside, has a familiar smell).  But!  This weekend I broke through the shackles and had a great time!

I am actually going to attribute a large portion of my JOY about this weekend to the sudden uptick in exercise.  I realized this weekend that January was coming to an end, and I would have to run the Cherry Blossom 10-Miler in approximately 2 months.  Groan.   On Saturday I took advantage of the non-rain/snow and went for a 3- mile run (....jog/walk) in the sunny cold.  Afterwards, I showered, ran some errands, and then met up w/ the girls in Georgetown for a Dean & Deluca chat that led to a warm apartment with pita chips and  boxed wine (score!).  I then cruised east to sketchily pick up my Jeff Mangum tickets from a BFF on the corner of 11th & U Street, in front of Solly's.  We exchanged goods through the window of my car before I promptly sped away, lest I be discovered by the cops.  I followed my shady behavior with a good deed, and picked up dinner for my sad stray dog boyfriend who is presently dying from pneumonia.  (True story about the pneumonia.  Not so true about the dying .... yet.)  After gobbling down Ben's Chili Bowl, I ditched the sad stray dog BF to watch Jeff Mangum play strong at Lincoln Theater.  Then I went home to my cousin's house, watched a re-run of Saturday Night Live and fell asleep in an armchair with a blanket around me by 12:30.  SO.  SOLID.

Sunday was a similar speed of happy good fun times.  After much whining, I put on my running clothes and went for a 4.5 mile jog with cousin K.  She had planned a route full of hills, and I grumbled the whole way.  We then hit up the local Farmer's market, snagged some sweet produce and celebrated our industriousness with homemade egg omelette, kale, and potato hash.  (We also broke K's sink drain, and flooded the kitchen floor.  Whoops.)  Then I cruised to the office to do some work (siiiigh), but couldn't get on the computer.  So, I ditched, checked in on sad stray dog BF, came home (to my parent's house), made my lunch of tomorrow, made my dinner for tonight, and prepped my dinner for tomorrow in the slow cooker pot.

DOMESTIC WEEKEND  DOMINATION!!

Currently Listening:  
Billy Joel - "You May Be Right"
(I may be crazy / But it just may be a lunatic you're looking for / Don't try to change me / Take me as I am because you might enjoy some madness for awhile.) 


The Dead Weather - "I Can't Hear You" 
(Jack White, you make me wish it was the 90s again.) 

Overdue Honesty Check

Since passing two (2!) state bar exams this summer, I have basically forced myself to forget about Studying for the Bar Exam.   But, over breakfast with an old friend, he complimented me on how "coolly" I handled the situation and I erupted into pained laughter.

The snapshot below is my score for a practice MBE that Barbri gives to all students nationwide halfway through the summer.  After all its students nationwide take the test, Barbri scores and ranks everyone.  Takeaway: Halfway through the summer, after a month and a week of studying, I scored in the bottom 5% of students taking the practice MBE nationwide.  If the bar exam had been given on July 1st, I would've failed.  Hands down.

So yeah.  I was NOT "cool" when I was studying for the bar exam.  I was a hot mess.  It is absolutely astounding that I passed anything.  Let alone two in a row.  Victory!


Currently Listening:  James Blake - "Wilhelm Scream" 
(I don't know about my dreams anymore / All that I know is I'm falling, falling, falling) 

Girls Like Superheroes.

Rock it, Riley.  I want a Superhero toy too.

But ... he smells like ranch dressing!

Has anyone visited the National Christmas tree over by the White House lately?  It's basically the saddest tower of lopsided pine I have ever seen.  It is!  I was so visibly (and verbally) appalled by the sight this afternoon that a member of the Park Police (or Secret Service) sauntered up and we had the following conversation: 

PP (Park Police): Yeah, we been making fun of that thing all day.

ME:  Is that REALLY it? 

PP:  Yeah, they said that's all they could get. 

ME:  For the President?!?!  (note: incredulous.  maybe fury). 

PP:  Well, the first one got knocked over or something in the wind storm, so this is the best they could send over regulation size or something.  We're hoping it'll grow a few feet by Christmas.  

When was there a wind storm that knocked over the first tree?? Why didn't FoxNews have that guy who thought the Rapture was coming report on it? Poor Obama. We all have to be Charlie Brown sometimes.  

In other news, I spent this lovely Sunday afternoon at the ... National Holocaust Museum.  Because nothing says "holiday spirit and festive" quite like a good chunk of time reading about Nazi War Propaganda.  I found this single poster one of the more disturbing pieces of political propaganda; not just because the eyes follow you around the room, but because of it's striking familiarity.  When's the last time I saw a famous campaign poster featuring the solo image of a candidate's face rising above one word that conceptualized his entire message?  WHAT? I guess what it takes to win over voters doesn't seem to change much.   

And finally.  I must go to bed and bid the world, adieu, adieu, to you, and you, and you.  

Currently Listening:  Black Keys - "Tighten Up".  

(When I was young and moving fast, nothing slowed me down / Nothing slowed me down / Now, I let the others pass.) 

My Political Idols Meet

What I would not give to be a fly on that Burmese wall at this moment.  Literally.

Currently Listening:  Amos Lee - Windows Are Rolled Down
(Is it what you dreamed it'd be? / Or are you locked up in this fantasy? / Oh, the miles that have torn us apart / My newfound faith coats my broken heart).